Tag: Marriage Life

  • Embracing Love in Later Life: A Comprehensive Guide for Senior Couples

    Embracing Love in Later Life: A Comprehensive Guide for Senior Couples

    The golden years usher in a distinct chance for senior couples to embrace a fresh chapter together. Marrying later in life entails many possibilities and adjustments, from financial realignments to shifts in lifestyle. This piece serves as a guiding light, offering indispensable counsel for navigating this enriching phase hand in hand. It’s a roadmap to ensure a seamless transition into the beauty of shared life in later years.

    Maximize Benefits with Financial Updates

    Upon entering marriage in your senior years, it’s vital to reassess your financial landscape. This includes thoroughly reviewing your tax filing status and Social Security information. Marriage may influence your benefits and tax obligations, so consulting a financial advisor is prudent. They can guide you through the potential impacts and help optimize your monetary strategy as a couple, ensuring you fully leverage the benefits available.

    Entrepreneurship as a Bonding Venture

    Starting a business in retirement — such as consulting, pet care, tutoring, or writing — is not just a path to financial stability; it’s a chance to deepen your bond. Besides, you don’t have to commit to a 9-to-5 schedule when you go with a flexible business idea.

    Working together on a shared venture allows you to spend quality time, leveraging your combined experiences. These endeavors provide a platform to explore your passions while enhancing your income. It’s a harmonious blend of personal fulfillment and economic opportunity.

    Navigating Health Coverage Together

    Medicare becomes a focal point for senior couples, and understanding your coverage options is paramount. Take time to research and compare Medicare plans to ensure you both have the optimal coverage for your health needs. Assistance is available through Medicare counselors, who can offer valuable insights and help you navigate the complexities of health insurance in marriage, ensuring peace of mind regarding your healthcare strategy.

    Unified Yet Independent Financial Planning

    Open communication about finances paves the way for a harmonious life together. Discuss your financial goals, responsibilities, and any existing assets or debts openly. Consider establishing a joint account for shared expenses, while maintaining individual accounts for personal use. Crafting a budget that reflects your combined income and expenses will help manage your financial life smoothly, balancing shared goals and individual freedom.

    Creating a Shared Sanctuary

    Finding a home that suits both your needs and preferences is crucial. Whether it’s downsizing to a more manageable space or embarking on a new adventure together, the right home can significantly enhance your quality of life. Considerations such as location, accessibility, and amenities should align with your lifestyle and preferences, ensuring your home is not just a place to live, but a sanctuary for your shared life.

    Exploring the World Together

    Travel opens up a world of experiences and memories for senior couples. It’s an opportunity to explore new cultures, cuisines, and landscapes, enriching your life together. Consider your interests and mobility when planning trips to ensure a comfortable and enjoyable journey. From serene cruises to adventurous road trips, the world is yours to explore together.

    Enhancing Your Home for the Future

    Investing in your home to improve its value and comfort can make your living space more enjoyable and functional. Consider updates that enhance accessibility, such as installing grab bars in the bathroom or ensuring the home is easily navigable for potential mobility aids.

    Energy-efficient upgrades contribute to a more sustainable lifestyle and offer significant cost savings over time. Strategic renovations can transform your home into a haven that supports your lifestyle and increases its market value.

    Conclusion

    Marrying in your senior years opens up a myriad of opportunities to enrich your life together. By thoughtfully addressing financial, health, and lifestyle considerations, you can lay a strong foundation for a fulfilling partnership. Embrace this chapter with open communication, shared goals, and an adventurous spirit, ensuring your golden years together are as vibrant and rewarding as the journey that brought you here.

    If you enjoyed this article, you can find more helpful relationship content at YourDevan.com!

  • The Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Won’t Marry You Yet 

    The Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Won’t Marry You Yet 

    There are so many reasons why your boyfriend won’t marry you, and if you’re not ready to ask him yet, let’s dig into what’s probably in his mind.

    Been Dating for Years Now, This Could Be The Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Won’t Marry You Yet 

    At some point, marriage is a milestone in a relationship. After some times of dating and you feel like he’s the right one, you want to legalize your relationship. 

    But sadly, he doesn’t seem to be on the same page as you. Which then left you wondering why your boyfriend won’t marry you.

    There could be so many reasons and it doesn’t always mean that he doesn’t love you. 

    And if you’re not sure how to ask him, scroll down to discover what’s probably inside his mind.

    1. He wants to focus on his career first 

    There are people who tend to be more focused on their careers—and your boyfriend may be one of them. 

    Marriage is a kind of relationship that requires serious commitment and he doesn’t want to split his energy between romance and work.

    But it doesn’t mean that being married and having a serious job can’t go hand-in-hand, but some people want to give his 100% and don’t want to risk it. 

    Also, he wants to make sure that he’s financially stable to start a family. Cause we all know, you can’t have a good life with no money at so many points. 

    So, he wants to simply have a stable career first before stepping into the next phase of life.

    2. He is still haunted by his past

    Marriage is a long-term relationship and bringing a lot of baggage from his past won’t do any good for your future. 

    This could be the reason why he doesn’t want to marry you yet, even though you guys have been dating for years and years now. 

    Maybe he is traumatized by his parent’s marriage or had a bad relationship with his ex. In this case, both of you need to have a deep talk or some therapy.

    Discover More: How to tell my boyfriend I’m pregnant (unplanned)

    3. He had been married once

    Believe it or not, people who have been married once don’t likely want to get married again. 

    Especially when his previous marriage didn’t end on a good note. There could be many issues around it, from co-parenting problems to incompatibilities. 

    The failed marriage traumatizes him and he doesn’t want to experience it over again. Yes he loves you, but he knows marriage is so much harder to do. 

    4. He has a particular perspective about marriage

    Another possible reason why your boyfriend doesn’t want to marry you is his view about marriage itself. 

    Free soul as he is, marriage seems like a bind that envelops him from everything that he enjoys. 

    He loves his freedom and prefers to remain so. He does love you, but he isn’t ready to let go of his own life yet.

    Discover More: How to tell your boyfriend you want to wait until marriage? 

    5. There’s some administrative reasons

    Do you and your boyfriend have different nationalities or both of you are living abroad? 

    In certain situations, administrative reasons make it hard for two people to legitimize their relationship. 

    When you don’t live in your own country or believe in the same religion, there’s so much paperworks to get done.

    6. He isn’t ready financially

    Weddings are expensive, and so is life after. Becoming financially ready must be a top priority before getting married. 

    Some people just cannot afford to risk it and wait for themselves to be financially stable. 

    This should work both ways, for you and your boyfriend. Do not step into marriage with debts or when you’re still financially dependent on each other. 

    Discover More: What to do when my boyfriend says he can’t see a future?

    7. He worries about the divorce rate

    What stops men from proposing? The high divorce rate could be among the reasons. Divorce is not as simple as separation. 

    It doesn’t solely affect people who are involved emotionally but it takes a toll on your finances too. That’s why prenuptial agreement is very important today. 

    8. He doesn’t need marriage to legitimize the relationship

    When you are so in love with each other and become very comfortable in the relationship, is marriage necessary? 

    There are people who think that dating for a long time is better than being married, which brings many psychological burdens of being attached to each other for the rest of their lives. 

    As long as you’re committed, marriage doesn’t seem as important, at least for some people. 

    After reading all the possible reasons, now you might wonder what to do when your boyfriend doesn’t want to marry you? 

    Don’t be devastated and feel unloved, instead keep your head cool and have a deep talk with him. Ask him to be as honest as possible and be ready to hear the worst of it.

    You also have to prepare yourself for marriage. This is not an easy decision for everyone.

    Marriage is also not about love alone, but commitment at every layer of commitment.

    On the other hand, if he’s not ready and doesn’t try to prepare himself to start a family, maybe it’s a sign that he’s not on the same page as you.

    Discover More: Learn about Dating Culture Differences between East and West

  • What to Do When He Won’t Leave His Wife?

    What to Do When He Won’t Leave His Wife?

    Love affair is in the sky. Yes, sometimes we fall in love with the wrong ones but not with someone’s husband. Let’s find out what to do when he won’t leave his wife here! 

    What to Do When He Won’t Leave His Wife?

    Maybe you don’t know that he’s married but you are already in a relationship with him and won’t stop. Or, you know he got a wife but you are desperate to stay together. 

    Being stuck in an extramarital relationship sucks. On the one hand, you feel that he is your soulmate, but then he has already started a domestic life with someone and even has children. 

    What’s more disturbing, he makes sweet promises and it’s as if he really loves you and chooses you as her life partner. And you had no problem being his mistress all along. 

    Umm, what to do when he won’t leave his wife to be with you? Let’s discuss it here! 

    1. Maybe You Should Stop The Game 

    The first time you commit an illicit affair, you should know this type of relationship is hard to last forever. It’s even confusing to be called true love. 

    You’ve been someone’s mistress for years and he can’t make you the one, you can’t even be seen in public together holding hands. 

    He can’t file a divorce to his wife. Admit it that the love affair is just temporary. Yes he likes you, but he doesn’t want a commitment. 

    It’s time to call it off. The relationship is not going anywhere, just like running on the treadmill forever. 

    2. Think about His Wife and Family 

    You say you love him? But his wife sacrifices everything to be with him and he does everything he could to marry her, right? They have been on a long journey you don’t know. 

    As a woman yourself, how would you feel if someone stole your husband and the dad of your kids? Think you are not only ruining her life and her dreams, but also the kids’ life. 

    Please, give up on him. That’s what you need to do when he won’t leave his wife. 

    You may also wanna read about 10 Reasons Why Your Girl Doesn’t Have An Orgasm

    3. The Illicit Affairs Almost Have No Good Ending

    Whether he is happy or unhappy with his life, he won’t leave his wife and the kids. Why can’t he divorce with his wife? Because they got their life together. 

    The wife helps him on a daily basis with chores and activities. It’s not only about cooking, cleaning, or doing household stuff, but everything in between to complete his life. 

    If she wasn’t a housewife type but a working mom, she completes him to work together to pay the bills, income sharing, retirement plans, education insurance, health insurance, home and car insurance, even debt. He is probably quite satisfied with his life. 

    In fact, it is very rare for a cheating man to divorce with his wife for the sake of his mistress. If a man really doesn’t love his wife anymore, or can’t stand his wife’s shit anymore, he must have left her before he even met you. 

    But now you see, after so many years of making you his mistress and acting like he gives you everything you ever needed, he is not divorced (well, even his wife got pregnant again!). It’s about illicit affairs, which start in beautiful rooms and end in the parking lot. 

    4. Accept The Fact That Two of You Are Not Compatible

    Why do you think he is into you? Because you can make him feel happier, but it doesn’t mean he will give his life for you. Doesn’t mean he needs you in his life. 

    Yes he did everything to gain your trust and make you think it is love, but it’s not.

    Also, he is a big fat liar. He lies to his wife, kids, and he tricks you too. Don’t you see?  

    And the woman you compete with is his wife, he chooses her over again, not you. You are in one sided blind love, he doesn’t care if what you feel about him is real. He never thought to leave his wife for you to come in.

    You may also wanna read about How to Make Your Girl Happy If You’re Poor and Retarded?

    5. History Repeat Itself 

    Let’s say he got a beautiful wife and a perfect family, but he still cheats on them. Even if he really leaves his wife now for you, don’t you think he is gonna cheat you again with some prettier chicks out there? 

    Umm, because you are no longer ‘making him happy’ when he sees you everyday. 

    6. Remember The Karma 

    When you hurt somebody, you will get hurt too someday. The same thing or other ways, you will learn that karma is real.  

    7. Be Smart and Realistic

    Dear beautiful woman, you are hurting yourself by being his mistress for so long and thinking he will divorce with his wife to be with you.

    He gives you money and purses and a penthouse, but you will always be a back up plan for him. 

    You are not his home. You know that. Even when he told you he will leave his wife soon, he is not gonna do that sooner or later. 

    What to do when he won’t leave his wife is nothing but stop. That’s hard but it’s harder to keep an illicit affair, mostly if you are looking for real true love and commitment. 

    Hopefully, you find the way to let go and move on from a bad relationship with a wrong partner. We can’t help who we fell in love with but remember that you should be smart to decide who you should and shouldn’t keep the relationship with.

  • Indonesian Muslim Wedding Ceremony (Sacred Steps and Ceremony)

    Indonesian Muslim Wedding Ceremony (Sacred Steps and Ceremony)

    Do you wanna know about Indonesia muslim wedding ceremony? In every country, the marriage tradition must have its own characteristics and uniqueness. It is also the same for some Islamic countries in the world, such as Indonesia, India, and Saudi Arabia, which are predominantly Moslem must also have diversity and tradition in carrying out such a sacred event, The Marriage.

    Indonesian Muslim Wedding Ceremony (Sacred Steps and Ceremony)

    Despite having different tribes and groups, Indonesian Muslim has a patent tradition that must be met and fulfilled in a series of weddings. Here is the series of Indonesian muslim wedding ceremony!

    1. Ask for Considerations

    For a Muslim man, before he decide to marry a woman to be his wife, let him also ask for consideration from his close relatives. They should be people who know exactly about marriage, religions, and mostly older people to give him some valuable advice. 

    Similarly for women who will be proposed by a man, she should ask for consideration from her close relatives who have good insight into religion and marriage. Also, this becomes an important first stage to have their willingness. Mostly, they need to ask their parents before getting married. This has also become the part of praying both from the family members.

    In some areas, they ask for marriage consideration by kneeling on the parent’s knee, telling them good things, apology, grateful expression, and everything they need to say. Indeed, they may talk heart to heart and likely discuss about life after marriage and so on.

    2. Sholat Istikharah (Prayer)

    After getting consideration from the closest relative, both the future wife and husband are suggested to do Sholat Istikharah to establish and ask Allah what is the best decision to take. Sholat istikharah is a prayer to ask Allah to choose what is right and what is better to do when you are in doubt of something.

    This prayer is not only done for the purpose of finding a mate only, but in all matters if a person experiences a sense of indecision to take a decision about an important thing. This is to abstain from the possibility of falling into the suffering of life. May Allah give us the easy way in deciding the right choice.

    Istikhara prayer time can be done anytime both day and night, but the best time is during one-third night or can be said in the middle of the night after Shalat Isya at night. It’s held in 3 rakat and almost the same as performing salat in general. It’s preferred to read Surat Al Kafirun in the first rakat and Surat Al Ikhlas in the second rakat

    You may also want to read: South Korean Dating Culture – 17 Traditions and Customs

    3. Khitbah (The Proposal)

    When you finally decide you really wanna marry that woman for sure, then you move to the next Muslim wedding tradition in Indonesia, which is called Khitbah in Arabic. Khitbah means the proposal. 

    The groom to-be needs to ask permission from the woman’s parents and family for the marriage. If the woman and her parents say yes, then you will organize the wedding, date, celebrations, and every detail needed. Further, you need to be ready to held Indonesia muslim wedding ceremony.

    4. Ijab Qabul (Marriage Settlement or Marriage Vow) 

    Ijab Qabul means the wedding vow. This is the main requirement in Islamic weddings. There are some main terms and obligation in Indonesian muslim wedding ceremony, they are: 

    • Agreement 

    Both the bride and groom agree to marry one and another based on love and responsibility in religion. The couple is not forced by anything to hold the wedding. They simply want a tight commitment, blessing, and will stay for each other for worse or better. 

    • Wali (The Guardians) 

    Wali is the term used to call the closest relatives from the bride to marry them. The Wali agreement’s is also one of the marriage obligation in Muslim tradition. You cannot get married without Wali’s witness and approval.

    For the groom, it’s not required to have Wali but it’s obligatory for the bride. Then, who can be the bride’s Wali? Here are the classification: 

    The closest male family from the bride, which is the father. If the father is already gone, her brothers can be the Wali. If the bride doesn’t have brothers, her uncles can be the Wali. Wali should be a male family, an adult, and healthy physically and mentally. 

    • Penghulu (The Headman)

    Penghulu is like the preacher who will lead the marriage ceremony according to the religion rules. Penghulu is also the representation from the religious courts. 

    The preacher will guide the bride to spell the wedding vow in front of Wali, the witness, and everyone there. We will explain on the next point about the wedding vow in Islamic rule.

    You may also wanna read about Learn about Dating Culture Differences between East and West 

    • The Witness 

    The next mandatory in Islamic wedding rule is the witness. The marriage without witness approval is not valid. 

    There are 2 witnesses needed to to testify that you two are married. The witness can be anyone in this classification: 

    • Adult male. 
    • Muslim. 
    • Mentally healthy. 
    • Not blind, mute, or deaf. 
    • Witnesses must understand the language used by Wali and the groom.

    The witness can be the groom’s relative, the bride’s relative, the religious leader, community leaders, or a trusted relative. 

    • Mahar (Dowry) 

    Islam glorifies women by requiring men to marry the women by giving her Mahar (dowry). Islam does not set certain value limits in this dowry, but based on the agreement of both parties. Islam also prefers easy and simple dowry and something that’s not too much. 

    In the process, the groom should spell the Ijab Qabul correctly in front of Penghulu, Wali, Witness, and the bride if you prefer to. This consists of the name of the bride, the bride father’s name, and the dowry. Actually, this is not just Indonesian muslim wedding ceremony but the marriage obligation for all Muslim based on the holy book. 

    You may also want to read: An Open Letter to My Abusive Ex Boyfriend’s New Girlfriend

    5. Walimah ‘Ursy (The Wedding Celebration)

    Walimah ‘Ursy or commonly known as the wedding celebration. The word Walimah itself comes from the word al-Walamu which in English means “meeting”. In the Fiqih dictionary, mentioned that Walimah is food for weddings. 

    For the celebration, you can manage if you wanna invite people or you just wanna invite your closest families and friends. The most important thing is the couples notify people that you two are married. You could wear Indonesia muslim wedding dress, for the bride is a long gown with hijab, that could be modern or traditional gown. 

    That’s about Indonesian muslim wedding ceremony. Marriage is a direct trust of Allah and His Messenger, and every mandate demands responsibility. What an extraordinary marriage, even with a simple saying, with the aqad marriage, the deed of which was originally forbidden now is halal allowed. Now the couple lives happily in the wedding by Allah’s approval.